Stan has five minutes before another soul-snuffing office meeting and his only escape from professional obligation is sweet, chilly death. Use your finger to guide Stan around the environment and use his surroundings to improvise his ruination – take a stapler to the face, dive head first into the paper shredder, take a big ol' bite of the urinal cake in the men's restroom – just have fun with it! It’s a don’t-miss opportunity to off yourself, virtually. It’s healthier that way. And you can store your fastest times to gloat amongst your buddies later or post them to Facebook for everyone to see how proficient you are at dying.

But you don't have to go it alone. Five Minutes to Kill (Yourself) for iPhone has a Bluetooth or Wi-Fi multiplayer mode too, so you and a friend can race to the afterlife. Since just about everything in the office is one-time use you'll have to compete for the best and most deadly tools.